The parked car nap
Having a small baby (or even a 1 year old who still isn't a great sleeper) can be mind-blowingly exhausting, you can feel so tired you're delirious and by 6am you have no idea how you can possibly get through the day. The traditional advice is 'sleep when the baby sleeps' which is often easier said than done when your house is gradually disappearing under a mountain of washing and you have no idea when you're going to have time to go for a wee let alone make dinner. Sometimes it takes an age to even get them to sleep then when you put them down they're awake within 5 minutes. I find however that often if I've been out in the car Jem is asleep when we get back, if left undisturbed she often doesn't wake for quite a while once the car has stopped but if I try to move her she'll be wide awake. So as soon as I'm parked up in the driveway I recline the seat, put an audiobook on my phone and get a quick nap in! (Obviously only do this when your car is parked safely and not a risk of being shunted if you've got your seatbelt off and the seat reclined. Also very tiny babies arn't meant to spend huge amounts of time in car seats so you should wait until they're a bit older).
Your outfit is easier to change than theirs
This is
probably the most crazy of my tips; it involves putting practicality before
glamour but I'm sure it saved me many hours of having a miserable crying baby
even if it did create a bit
more washing! In the early days of breastfeeding
your supply is still settling and for me I suffered the problem of having a lot
of milk that came out very fast known as 'fast letdown'. 'What a great
problem to have' I hear you say, 'so much better than panicking about not
having enough'. While it certainly does rank quite well in the list of problems
you can have with breastfeeding it does cause issues. My little girl would
loosen her latch to cope with the high flow and consequently suck in lots of
air, (I didn't realise this was what was happening until I got some support from
the awesome ladies at Breastfeeding Norfolk) this meant,
particularly in the evening when she would feed for longer, that she would have
a lovely big feed, be all sleepy and relaxed and then projectile vomit up the
entire feed in the style of The Exorcist and we'd have to start all over
again. What was particularly frustrating was that feeding would make her
all lovely and sleepy and even the vomiting wouldn't particularly wake her up but
if she was then covered in sick it was horrible to have to pull her about,
change her outfit wake her up completely and stress her out. When
you've got an unsettled colicky baby the last thing you want when
you've finally got them relaxed is to stress them out again and have to
start from scratch. So after a few nights of this (as well as trying to
work on getting her latched on better to prevent her vomiting in the first
place) I got to know when she was going to do this. I'd be armed with
piles of muslins (who ever knew you could need so many muslins!!!) and as she
was starting to gag I'd tip her to try and catch the vomit on the muslins but
if it didn't go on the muslins I'd make sure it went on me and not on
her! Ok so I got through a lot of PJs and had to wash my dressing gown
many times but it just made life so much easier! I could call for Daddy assistance,
he'd have a snuggle while I had a quick wash and change and I could be back to
feeding my sleepy bubba again nice and quick rather than having to undress a
squalling distressed mini person who was so often heartbreakingly unhappy in
the evenings. So Mummies if you take the vomit you'll
actually save yourself a lot of hassle plus you have an excuse for a nice hot
bath once the bub is finally settled (as if you need an excuse)!Ditch the changing bag
There seems to be a great fashion for changing bags, you can spend nothing short of a small fortune on one, I suppose if looking fashionable is your thing then this tip won't be for you but then all my tips are based more on practicality than fashion. I didn't buy a changing bag before my little girl was born but in the post-birth haze I decided I must need one and wasted £25 because in the end I reverted back to my plan of using a back pack. I've been very thrifty on all my baby purchases so I was somewhat annoyed on that this one got past me. I don't find changing bags very practical; they're carried uncomfortably on 1 shoulder when you're back is already buckling under the weight of a rapidly growing bubba, if you're inclined to carry your baby in a sling then a shoulder bag is completely useless and their use is limited to at most the time your baby is in nappies if not less. Instead I would suggest investing in a good quality backpack, comfortable to carry, can be used with a carrier, tons of handy pockets and it's use goes on and on.
Cloth wipes but not just for the bubba
I had no idea that cloth wipes even existed until a friend told me about them and they are without a doubt one of the best baby related purchases I have made! There are lots of different options but I went for the full terry kit from Cheeky Wipes. At first glance they seem pricey however I saved money within just a few weeks of using them, they are much more effective than normal baby wipes and much gentler on skin so it's a win win win! Even if you're not looking at using cloth nappies just switching to washable wipes is a great way to do a bit for the environment and they can just be popped in with your usual washing, I really can't recommend them enough. I would advise buying a second set of wipes though as you really need around 50, one for the wash and one in use. To give the other reason these are so amazing I have to reveal the gory reality of having had an episiotomy; nobody tells you that when you've had a baby you'll feel like your whole bottom is going to fall out, in hindsight it's obvious that this would happen but it never really crossed my mind. Add to this having a massive great cut through one of the most delicate parts of your body and some of those stitches coming apart, it's pretty difficult to sit down comfortably for a good few weeks. If you're unlucky and the stitches come apart it's terrifying and it feels like it will take forever to heal (if this happens get it checked by your midwife or GP), what is really important to do is to keep everything really clean and prevent infection. For this these wipes were an absolute godsend; I used them dry rather than wetting them as your normally would, after each visit to the loo have a good rinse with a jug of warm water and use a clean wipe to pat dry, I fully credit them for being able to have a wide open wound in such a vulnerable area but avoid any infection.
It doesn't always make sense to wake your husband up
This one
could be very controversial but it worked really well for us. Don't
misunderstand me, I'm not excusing partners from their fair share. My
husband has always been amazing with helping with every aspect of parenting,
he's never once complained about changing a nappy, getting up in the night,
taking her so I can have a rest and he always does it with a great deal of enthusiasm
and love that makes me love him even more (sorry went into soppy mode there). I
realised within about a week though that I didn't want him up with me every/all
the time I was up in the night. We were both getting progressively more
exhausted and grumpy until I just told him I needed him to go to bed.
Jemima would cluster feed in the evening, this is where babies feed over and
over again for several hours, usually in the late evening or early morning,
it's part of them building up their milk supply (it's so hard at the time but
now looking back I would give anything to have another of those snuggly
evenings with my tiny squish). This would usually be from around 7pm until
midnight-1am, when it started I would get settled in my nursing chair, put
something good on Netflix on the tablet, get my hubby to supply me with a cup of
tea, snacks and water and send him to bed. Then when she finally stopped
wanting to feed constantly I'd settle her down next to me in her crib and get
some sleep, if she wanted feeding in the night often I wouldn't disturb him
although if there was a nappy to do sometimes I would, then in the morning when
generally she was more settled he would get up early, take her downstairs and
bring her back up only if she needed feeding so I could get a few more hours
sleep without worrying about her. (Please note this advice comes with an important
caveat: It is very important you don't fall asleep feeding you baby sitting up
so if you're struggling to stay awake then do not struggle on, wake you partner
up and get them to help!) This system really worked for us, for others
if the baby cluster feeds in the early hours it might work better to do it the
other way round and for Mum to get an early night while Dad takes a shift.
Either way it's worth working out a system that gives you both a bit of time to
sleep.
I'd love
to hear your feedback on my slightly out there tips and hear what other crazy
ideas people have come up with.
Keep up the good work Mummies
The Happy Geek
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