Today I went running with a toothbrush. My little girl was grumpy, tired, refusing to nap but all she wanted was to hold a toothbrush so off we went, she had the sleep she needed, I was refreshed, it was a win win. I thought I'd share with you some of my reasons for buggy running in the hope that if you're teetering of the edge of whether to go for it you'll feel inspired to step out there.Every purchase I've made as a parent (well almost every, it's fun to indulge a little sometimes) I've really tried to keep the cost down and assess whether something is really worth the money. So spending money on a running buggy felt somewhat indulgent. It doesn't have to be expensive, there are lots of second hand options but I felt a little worried, would I use it enough? Was I being ridiculous to think that I'd actually have the time or energy to get out there? Was I being selfish? As it happens I must have fought these feelings quite well as I did indulge somewhat in a Bugaboo Runner, which even second hand was £300, when I could have found one a lot cheaper, for me this was one of my most expensive parenting purchases but I am soooo glad that I went for it. Buggy running has been an amazing release and it has helped me through some of the difficult experiences of parenting.
When you become a Mum the loss of your sense of self can be all consuming. For me this was an experience I was mostly able to embrace and enjoy, for others it is a time of self-doubt and worry, for those unlucky enough to suffer with post-natal depression it can be an extremely hard time. However we react to it this massive change is overwhelming, it engulfs you with a huge sense of responsibility, your instinct becomes for your child, their hunger, their tiredness, their emotions, it is all encompassing, terrifying, you become wrapped up in the needs of another person who is so dependent on you. I was one of the lucky ones who got that immediate surge that enabled me to embrace the first few exhausting days and weeks with joy (though many tears mixed in too), I know others find it a more challenging time and it takes longer. Despite this my own desires and dreams didn't just dry up and disappear, I would give each and every one of them up for my daughters wellbeing if I needed to but still they remain present, I love to be creative, I love to read, I love a glass of wine and I love to run. The problem I've found is that there seems to a drip drip drip of guilt from all sides that makes us doubt that we can marry up these ambitions with our desire to be the best mother we can be. Whether it's the comment another mum makes about not having showered in a week that makes me wonder if I'm a terrible mother because somehow I've managed to shower every day this week or the facebook post from a friend about the 3 hrs they spent today constructing intricate and engaging activities for their 2 week old when all I've managed to do is cuddle on the sofa smelling slightly of baby vomit, there's so often little creeping thoughts that make us question ourselves. Yet can't we try and find a way to be entirely devoted to our children and still have our own interests and passions. It's incredibly hard and I do appreciate that it's easier at the moment because I only have one child but if we can find ways to do it it must be healthy for our children to grow up being inspired by their Mums? I don't really buy into the principle of 'Happy Mummy, happy baby' because it can be used to justify some things that aren’t in the babies best interests, putting their emotional needs aside to meet our own, but surely there is a way of balancing the two, meeting our needs, taking care of ourselves helps us also to better meet theirs. We don't have to feel that as a mother we need to loose every bit of our self otherwise we're not loving our child enough, we can take time to care for ourselves and through doing so care better for them. For me one of the answers to this conundrum is buggy running and this is my 7 reasons why...
Fitness
There's not much to explain about this one but what I would say is that it can be helpful to remind ourselves of how our fitness will benefit not just us but the life of our children. This is an important antidote for when the Mummy guilt trickles in, I remind myself that focusing on my fitness is not just in my interests. it is in my daughters, so I'm not being selfish by putting this focus on me.
Mental Health
If you're struggling with your mental health or think you may be experiencing post-natal depression please seek help from family, friends and see your GP, there's absolutely no shame in it and there's loads of help out there. In more general terms and even for those of us who don't have to struggle with post-natal depression or other mental health issues, parenting is really really hard. It pushes you to the limit of your patience, to the edge of mental as well as physical exhaustion, there are times you're convinced your baby hates you they've cried so much that day, there are days you feel like you can't do anything right, you question yourself all the time. I have found that buggy running has helped hugely with this, it clears my head, it gives me perspective, it gives me time to myself when I can't actually have time by myself, it re-energises me. I really can't overstate how good buggy running can be for your mental wellbeing as a parent. Of course it can take a lot of effort and resolve to get out there but there has never once been a time when I have not felt so much better for it. I will reiterate please do seek help if you're struggling but if you're looking for a way to reinvigorate yourself you may just find this is it. Inspire
I want my
daughter to live an active, adventurous, healthy life. Childhood obesity is
becoming an epidemic; the reasons for this are multifaceted but ultimately boil
down to children having a worse diet and more sedentary lifestyle. It's easy
to sit back and blame external influences but I feel if I can take a proactive
approach to exercise with my daughter from the start hopefully this will help
to encourage her as she grows up. I want her to be inspired, I want her to see
her Mummy pushing herself and taking on challenges and I hope as she grows this
will encourage her to do the same and an active lifestyle will come naturally
to her.
Nap Magic
My daughter has never been a great sleeper. She's 15 months and has never slept through the night, she's an early riser and really hard to get down for naps. I love her for her energy and constant need to be on the go which my husband frequently but affectionately reminds me is because she's exactly like me, but the constant battling for naps is probably the part of parenting that has tested me the most. I honestly find it hard to believe that there are babies out there who take 2 hour naps every day, it must be a myth, I could rule the world if I had 2 hours every day! When she was tiny I'd be lucky if I got much more than 15 minutes, often I'd spend half and hour getting her down for the nap only for her to wake up after 10 minutes (all normal baby behaviour I must add but so hard none the less). Now at 15 months I can sometimes get just over and hour but I have to work to get her down for it first and I can never really rely on her being down more than 45 minutes, anything more is borrowed time! So having a sure fire way to guarantee a nap is an absolute god-send. Of course it comes with a sacrifice because if I use the run for nap time then I haven't got that nap time to get anything else done like making dinner, housework etc so I have to be organised, but the sheer bliss of skipping the nap time battle is such a relief. Sometimes when she just will not nap I can feel my frustration and exhaustion kicking in so I abort the mission and change tactics and relief is wonderful. She doesn't often stay asleep too long once I'm back but I usually have time to quickly pop upstairs for a shower before she wakes. The flip side of this is that it's hard to go for a run without her falling asleep so I can't run if I don't want her to have a nap, e.g. late in the afternoon too close to bedtime, but on balance it's still a massive advantage of buggy running.
Energy Levels
This photo was taken in the afternoon after a night of approximately 3 1/2 hours sleep and a 3 mile run. Sometimes, in fact often there's just those days in parenting when you're at the end of your tether, you've had a terrible nights 'sleep', you're tired, the baby won't nap, you're stressed and exhausted. Coffee and cake is definitely a valid option but I'd say a run, coffee and cake is often an even better one. Once you've run the endorphins are pumping, you're feeling more positive, you've got fresh air in your lungs, you feel invigorated. While it doesn't fix the tiredness as such, I've found it doesn't make it any worse and it helps me get through the day and face the challenges of sleep deprivation less stressed out.
Fresh Air and Vitamin D
I've lost count of the amount of times that I've read articles or seen reports about how none of us and in particular children don't get enough vitamin D. Your body produces vitamin D when exposed to sunlight and vitamin D is important for bone development and growth but it's very hard in this country to ensure we get enough. Admittedly buggy running isn't an easy answer because I find when it's cold my little girl is quite covered up so not much skin apart from her face is exposed to sun and when it's hot she has to have suncream which blocks the production of vitamin D so it's doesn't prevent me feeling the need to give her a supplement of it (as recommended by the NHS) but every little bit of exposure helps to boost levels and combined with getting out in the fresh air it can only be a good thing.
Balancing Time for Everyone
As everyone
knows, when you become a parent finding time to do anything for yourself is
incredibly difficult. I found however it wasn't just as simple as worrying
about how I could find time for myself, I also found myself worrying about my
husband finding time for himself and how we balance the 2 while still
prioritising our daughter’s needs. My husband takes a really active role in
caring for our daughter and is always keen to help me out and give me a bit of
a break on his days off which is brilliant. The problem is that he works long hours,
is often off late and tired and therefore I always feel conscious that while he
loves spending loads of time with his daughter and at the same time giving me a
break at times he struggles to find time for himself just as much as I
do. I've found therefore that buggy running isn't something that is all
just about me being able to run when my husband is at work, I find it's also extremely
useful in helping us both to make the best use of our time and have time for
ourselves. While sometimes I like to run alone a lot of the time I'll still
buggy run even when he'd be able to look after her as then it gives him the opportunity
to get some of the jobs he wants to do done, or go to the gym, or have some
time to himself. This then allows us to have time together as a family
later in the day. So investing in a running buggy isn't just about helping yourself,
I find it can help the whole family to have a greater sense of balance.
I hope if you're toying with the idea of whether to try buggy running this has helped to convince you that it's something you should go for. The only down side is that your post run snack will never be safe again!This post has focused on why to buggy run but not how to. I'd really recommend the facebook group Running With Buggies, you can simply join and ask all the questions you need until you feel confident to get going. I often wonder what people think of me as I run down the road, I get some strage looks but a few words of encouragement too, whatever people think buggy running for me is definitely one of those activities that makes me feel like I'm getting one up on the world.
Happy buggy running,
The Happy Geek
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