Getting Close Now

I’ve been a bit lax in writing over the past week, I've been so busy that I haven’t had time to sit down and update you on everything.

Tears

By the end of last week I was at a pretty low ebb. I would have still described myself as coping OK but I felt like I was pretty much on the edge of my energy and my sanity. I managed to function and get through my shifts at work but I felt constantly at risk of a meltdown.  Working night shifts didn’t help; I’m always more emotional when I’m tired so fertility drugs and nights was not a good combination.  I worked Saturday night so on Sunday I got up after 4 hours sleep (I had to be back the right way round for a day shift on Monday) and Matt had cooked me a lovely roast dinner.  Unfortunately I didn’t really get that much enjoyment out of the roast dinner as I spent the whole thing sobbing into my plate.  There wasn’t a particular reason for it but I just felt utterly physically and emotionally wiped out.

Over the last week however I’ve started to feel remarkably better now that my dose of Buserelin – the suppression medication - has been dropped down and I’m starting to get some of my hormones back.  My energy levels are a lot better, I feel more stable and not constantly like I'm going to fall off an emotional ledge!

Gonal F

The side effects of the Gonal F haven’t been too bad.  As I said I feel like I have a lot more energy than in the suppression stage of the treatment, last week the thought of getting to bed much past 9 o’clock made me panic about how I was going to make it through work the next day, now I feel remarkably chirpy all things considered.   The main side effect that I have noticed is feeling very bloated, as I knew I would.  I’ve got a proper little paunch going on.  If I stand sideways and look in the mirror I could easily imagine I was pregnant which is highly depressing considering that may be something I never get to experience.  I don’t feel too uncomfortable with the bloatedness though, just as long as don’t wear my tightest pair of jeans it doesn’t bother me too much.  I’ve got a few more days of the simulation left though so my little paunch is going to get rather more pronounced.

 

Monitoring Scans Number 1&2


After about a week of the Gonal F they started scanning me every couple of days or so, I’ve had scans this week on Wednesday and today (Friday) and I’ve got another on Monday.  These are the usual internal scans which are somewhat uncomfortable and occasionally painful, getting to my right ovary on Wednesday proved particularly painful for some reason.  They’re over fairly quick though, 5 or 10 minutes so not too bad.   They have a look at the lining of your womb, how many follicles you have on each ovary and they measure the follicles.  Once they’ve finished the scan the computer plots the size of the follicles onto a graph so show how big they are and how much bigger they need to be.  So far my treatment seems to be going well; I have something around 18 follicles, some bigger than others and they seem to be developing nice and steadily meaning I’m all on tract for my egg collection next Wednesday.   I’ve tried not to do too much research into how many is a good amount of follicles as it's more about how many eggs they get, the quality of the eggs and ultimately how many good quality embryos they get (but even all that is entirely irrelevent if they fail to implant).   I’m happy just to take the fact that they say I’m having a good response to the medications at the moment and try not to obsess about things too much.

So now I have a few days to relax (well after tomorrow when I’m at work)  before my next and probably final scan on Monday and then the egg collection on Wednesday, eek!